I feel like my life has been moving past me at 100 miles an hour this past week and I just can’t seem to keep up with everything. It seems like I am going to drop all of the balls that I’m so carefully juggling all the time. Honestly, this week has left me feeling overwhelmed and defeated. (And cranky and irritable and short-tempered).
I have been looking forward to today all week because I have the day off (with a completely clear calendar until the evening — which NEVER happens). I had planned to get caught up with snuggles and laughter with the boys. And, the never-ending “to do” list of laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning, adoption paperwork, bills…
I had also planned to blog about our adventures last weekend in Florida and yesterday’s Easter egg hunt with sweet little friends. I really want to keep up to date with photos and happenings in our lives because I am using this as my journal for our family and I don’t want to forget all of the fun things we have been up to.
I will put that blog post off until another day because, this morning, God gently reminded me what the purpose of today is.
Today: Good Friday.
Today is the day we remember that Christ suffered through torture and humiliation. Then, He gave his beautiful, perfect, and holy life for you and I.
Sweet friends, do you have as hard a time wrapping your lil’ human mind around that as I do?
I can hardly grasp how Jesus could give Himself up for all of us. Why did it have to happen like that? Why did He sacrifice everything and become a defeated, broken body for us?
I have always wondered how God managed to hold himself back from opening the Heavens and lifting his sweet Jesus from that cross in order to remove him from the unbearable pain and heartache he was enduring on behalf of all of us earthly sinners. We are NOT worthy of that sacrifice.
But that is the point of it all, isn’t it? We are not worthy. We are LOVED.
Have you all read the book, “The Shack” by WM. Paul Young? (If not, I recommend it!)
Do you remember the section of the book when Mack was told to choose which two of his five children would spend eternity in “God’s new heavens and new earth” and which of his children would “spend eternity in hell”?
Do you remember what the judge told Mack as he started to panic at this thought?
She said, “I am only asking you to do something that you believe God does. He knows every person ever conceived, and he knows them so much deeper and clearer than you will ever know your own children. He loves each one according to his knowledge of the being of that son or daughter. You believe he will condemn most to an eternity of torment, away from His presence and apart from His love.”
After a little more discussion and panic about choosing among his own children, Mack finally screamed, “I can’t. I can’t. I won’t!”
Finally, he looked at the judge “pleading with his eyes” and said, “Could I go instead? If you need someone to torture for eternity, I’ll go in their place…” He then fell at her feet and cried and begged to go in place of his children.
She responded in a whisper, “Now you sound like Jesus.”
Reading this section of the book opened my eyes a little further to the depth of Jesus’ love for me. For each of us.
If someone were to ask me to choose an eternity in hell for either of my boys, I would not hesitate for a second; I would instantly beg and plead to take their place. To cover their transgressions with my love. I would do anything to protect them.
And, I am just a human with human flaws and human limitations. These are my children. They can mess up, they can make me angry, they can turn from me. But they will NEVER lose my love.
I look at these faces and I am filled with joy. Filled to the brim with overflowing love.
And, isn’t it incredible to know that God feels that way about us? But in a MUCH bigger way. In a way that we will probably never be able to comprehend while living in this flesh.