Blessings and Raindrops

seeking joy in the midst of the ordinary

God is with us in the wait.

If we’re friends on facebook, you know that I am just over this whole waiting thing.

I’m done. 

I’m ready to have S home. I’m ready for the boys to play with their sister instead of pretending to drive to Africa on their bikes to visit her. I’m ready to watch her grow up here in our home, instead of through photos {and, yes, the photos are treasures, little glimpses into her world…but, they are not substitute for the real thing}. I’m ready to ensure her belly is full of healthy food that will give her nourishment. I’m ready to hear her laugh. I’m ready to teach her new things. I’m ready to learn how she likes to sleep {ben has to be surrounded by his stuffed animals and holding onto two – very precise- tags on his blankets & nate likes to hold all three of his babies and be covered up with his blanket from grandma marrs with two others at his feet. they’re hilarious}. I’m ready to hold her and rock her to sleep. I’m ready to see her wearing the cute little outfits hanging in her closet. I’m ready to get to know her and her personality. I’m ready to hear her cry and learn what soothes her. I’m ready to teach her new words. I’m ready to show her the love of a family. I’m just ready, already.

All of it. The good, the bad and the ugly. I’m ready.

I shared this photo on facebook and received so many words of encouragement from loved ones. Many who have been here, smack dab in the middle of this tormenting wait, who understand the pain and the urgency and the tears.

I had a friend {who is in south africa right now to bring home their son!!}, share these wise words:

“Always remember that God is never separate from your wait. He is The Lord of waiting. He is the liberal giver of grace for the wait. Because your wait isn’t outside of his plan, but a vital and necessary part of it, he’s with you in your wait. And remember…God isn’t so much after the success of your life or ministry- he’s after you. So as you wait, tell yourself again and again: waiting isn’t just about what I get at the end of the wait, but about who I become as I wait.” -Paul Tripp 

What a poignant reminder of the work God is doing in my heart during this wait. A reminder that the dark nights of grieving and fear pressing down on me, attempting to crush my hope and trust; always give way to the light of the morning. The light that was purchased at such a high cost on a cross so many years ago. The light of His righteousness.

As for me, I look to the Lord for help. I will wait confidently for God to save me, and my God will certainly hear me…For though I fall, I will rise again. Though I sit in darkness, the Lord himself will be my light…the Lord will bring me out of darkness and into the light, and I will see His righteousness.
{Micah 7: 7-9}
I don’t know how much longer we will wait. Delays and uncertainty stretch as far as we can see from our place here on earth. Yet, God sees the big picture. He authored this story and knows how it ends. He knows the victory is coming.
Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed. {Habakkuk 2:3}

Comments

  2. Meredith says

    Oh Jenny! I love you girl and know you are so done with waiting but I'm marveling at how God is building your faithfulness during this time. Love and prayers!

    • jenny.marrs@yahoo.com says

      i can't put into words how grateful i am for the prayers for our girl. God has been at work in so many incredible ways, including creating new friendships and prayer warriors to lift her up in prayer!!!