I’m spending my birthday in Cape Town, South Africa. If you would have told me six months ago that my 38th birthday would begin with breakfast on the patio of our vacation rental, overlooking the ocean lapping against boulders on the shoreline below, I don’t know that I would’ve believed you. It still doesn’t even feel real to me. This last leg of our trip is one of extreme beauty and rest and abundance. Traveling with four young kids hasn’t been easy, there have been challenges, yet the good, sweet, want-to-freeze-time moments have most assuredly outweighed any hard ones.
I have much to catch up on from our time here, I’m still processing most of what we have seen and experienced and have been too busy living in the moment, forcing myself to be present, to recap and record our days. I tell myself there will be plenty of time to look back on these moments and record them once we are back home and back to our normal routine.
Yet, as I was working through my powersheets this morning, looking back on lessons I’ve learned this past year, I realized I should take a few moments to record these lessons here, mostly as a reminder to myself.
Lessons from the last year…
~ Trust. God’s sovereignty is worthy of trust. I haven’t shared all of the messy details around plans morphing and changing and paths being rerouted this past year in regards to ministry, but I can now look back on the twists and turns and clearly see God’s hand. His hand of protection, of guidance, of mercy and of grace. As we stand on the cusp on a new path, I am confident He has this. Only through our obedience, not our own power, will we succeed. My role, my identity, my calling are all securely placed in the palm of my Abba Father. I can release the need for control and the exhaustion of striving. I can walk in freedom.
~ Small. Quiet. Still. <<– Infinitely more powerful than loud, flashy and overstretched.
~ Small increments lead to progress. When I can’t see the full picture and I don’t know my place in the larger story, I simply need to start. I need to do the one thing before me, then do the next thing before me, and the next and the next. It sounds too simple, as though I need a complicated instruction manual for a fulfilling life. I don’t. It is simple. Just take the first step and trust God for the rest.
~ God plants us in communities and places for a season. Sometimes, He calls us to new places – scary, uncomfortable, unknown places. Yet, His promise to Moses remains true even today, even to me: “Just as I have been with Moses, I will be with you; I will not fail you or forsake you.” {Numbers 1:5}
~ Obedience brings blessing and life. This trip was against every natural pull toward comfort and safety, God knew how hard I would have to battle the enemy in order to step on that plane, in order to fight through the dark of night, in order to step into His blessing. He knew I would have to release every ounce of control and walk in absolute trust. He knew I would need prayer warriors holding our family through the long nights. He knew I would resist the blessing, the rest. He knew. Yet, here I am. I’ve walked through refining fire this month. I’ve battled long-ago buried demons. I’ve trusted God to show up. And, He has. Abundantly, faithfully, overwhelmingly. This time away, on the continent of our daughter’s birth country, holds so much pain and so much promise. I am slowly learning how pain and promise often intermingle and, only through obediently stepping into the pain, can we walk in the beauty of the promise.