Blessings and Raindrops

seeking joy in the midst of the ordinary

thoughts on this past month.

Lately, I’ve been walking alongside some of my dearest friends through the darkness of the valley. Unexpected illness. Unimaginable sorrow and grief. Confusion. Pain.

It has been a hard month for so many reasons.

Leaving our daughter behind as we flew home from Africa. Struggling with unresolved fear and anger over this process. Working to get back to “normal” after returning home. Wrestling with how to explain our trip to friends and family. Aching. Feeling isolated and misunderstood. Thankful that God is My Hope and Comforter.

Landing in Belgium and learning that a very close friend had been hospitalized back home with Guillain-Barre syndrome. Since that time, his condition has worsened and he was flown to Kansas City to receive treatment at KU medical. GBS left him completely {temporarily} paralyzed. His wife and two young children uprooted their lives to Kansas City in order to care for him and be by his side. He was recently transferred to a facility in Nebraska and has started to show signs of improvement. I am so, so thankful for this. I have been on my knees for this family so often over the past month. Confusion and fear and uncertainty have overcast all of us that are close to them. Scott was perfectly healthy one day and the next, he was hospitalized with this rare disorder. Hope is rising. Thankful that God is the Ultimate Healer. 

Pleading on behalf of a dear friend who, after waiting 3 long years for a referral, found out that the son they have claimed and loved deeply was severely ill in Ethiopia. We stormed the gates of Heaven on behalf of precious Cruz. Praying for healing for this little boy who touched the hearts of so many. And then, last Thursday, we learned that Cruz had gone home to Jesus. Tears flowed. Confusion and sorrow clouded my heart. I ached for my sweet friend, Cat. I just read a beautiful tribute to Cruz from another dear friend and am reminded why we continue to fight for the least of these. Because every child deserves a family that will love them unconditionally and claim them as their own. Thankful that God is the Father to the Fatherless and the Provider of Unexplainable Peace.  

I read THIS POST by Jen Hatmaker yesterday and it resonated so deeply with where I am right now as I struggle to walk alongside my sweet friends through this season of suffering…

“Suffering invites us to be radically human with one another, perhaps doing nothing more than reaching across the table, clasping hands, and weeping together. We are afforded the chance to create a safe place for someone else to mourn; nothing is needed but space, proximity, presence, empathy. You cannot possibly give an answer, so don’t try. Grief cannot be sidestepped; it must be endured, so may we be a people who endure with one another rather than constantly mitigating, explaining, propping up. Let’s just hold one another through the dark night and wait for the sun to rise.”

Amen. 

James MacDonald explains our tendency toward ungratefulness when circumstances feel out of our control {from his study, Always True}:

“Don’t disregard every good thing he has done for you, turn rebellious and ungrateful, and whine, “But I have to have this, God. If You don’t fix this situation, You’re not God. You don’t care about me.” Don’t put it all on the line over one thing and demand that God work right now. When we try this, we are not depending on God so much as we are trying to demonstrate just how much influence we have with Him.”

Today, I’m choosing to stand firm on His promises and reflect on His goodness. I will focus my attention and strength on every good thing He has done for me and for those I love, as we stand together in the valley waiting expectantly for the sun to rise. 

beautiful things.

I really don’t know how to put words to our experience in Congo.

Since we have been back home, we’ve been trying to see friends and family and catch up with everyone. It’s been busy since the moment we landed and I feel like I’m still processing everything we saw and felt and learned. I wish I could answer the question, “how was your trip?” with a simple tied-up-in-a-bow response. But, I can’t. Honestly, it feels impossible to describe our experience with words.

Congo is a place of extreme contrasts. 

The joy and love and gratitude were palpable in the home of Dr. Laure and her family. That home was a place of refuge and hope and peace during our trip.

The moments with S were surreal. Wonderful, magical moments learning about her personality and memorizing her features. And, moments where her fear was as real as her tears. It was so hard to want to hold her and comfort her yet knowing that my arms would not bring any solace to her right now.

The children we met were beautiful. We tread on holy ground in those orphanages. We felt hope rising out of these places of despair and gloom. Yet, we also felt such heaviness at the reality of day to day life for these precious, innocent children.

The landscape was beautiful past the smog and the diesel fumes and the dirt and the trash of the city. We saw small glimpses of the beauty of this country but we also saw the overwhelming need and anguish.

 
We sang Beautiful Things in church this morning and it was the exact reminder I needed today…

All this pain
I wonder if I’ll ever find my way
I wonder if my life could really change at all
All this earth
Could all that is lost ever be found
Could a garden come up from this ground at all

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You

“This song is an expression of hope that God will make beautiful things out of the dust in our lives, and God will somehow use us, use our obedience and love, our feeble human effort, and build Himself a kingdom. I see that God is using suffering to bring us closer to Him.” – Michael Gungor


He makes beautiful things. ALL things will be beautiful and made new. Even the chaos and the despair and the hurt and brokenness that we witnessed firsthand. And, I know with my entire being that He is drawing me closer to Him through this painful journey.


Revelation 21:4-5: And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.” Then He who sat on the throne said, “Behold, I make all things new.” And He said to me, “Write, for these words are true and faithful.”


I’ll have so many stories and moments to record from our time in Congo. I will share more in the coming days. I don’t want to forget a single memory from this life-changing experience.

Until then, enjoy this little glimpse into some of the fun we had with some of the most precious children I’ve ever met…

provision {spiritual markers}.

I’m human. I tend to forget. Easily.

I forget all that God has done. He has performed some pretty amazing, powerful, supernatural miracles on our journey to our daughter. And, I’m overwhelming grateful. In awe of His goodness. Even still, the fear creeps in. The worry, the doubt.

I need to record spiritual markers along the way. To remind myself of His faithfulness. Reminders to look back upon and rest in truth — He is on His throne and will receive the glory from our family’s story.

One of these reminders can’t be shared just yet. But, when I can tell you this story, you will see His hand in it. He answered a bold prayer in a way that we never imagined.  It was our prayer concerning the month of June. I knew that this month was laid on my heart by the Spirit and I just prayed that God would work in a mighty way. He did. He absolutely did. Oh, I can’t wait to share that story. It is truly incredible.

And, just this past weekend, we learned that {in less than one week!} our fundraiser for the orphans in the DRC was fully funded {we even exceeded our goal}!! We are going to be able to bless His beloved children with full bellies, fresh water and a soft spot to lay their weary heads because of the generosity of so many.

Then, another prayer was answered in an unexpected way. I have been praying about blessing our dear friend, Dr. L, with a vehicle. This would make her life a little easier. This would allow her to visit the orphanages that she serves out of love and compassion more often. This would allow her brother to use the vehicle as a taxi to earn additional income for their family. This would give her the opportunity to minister to many more little hearts in Kinshasa orphanages.

Dave had originally brought up this idea and we only shared with one other person, who joined us in prayer, knowing how this would indeed bless Dr. L and her family.

As the costs for our trip started piling up and the needs for the children were unending, I prayed a simple prayer. I asked God to find a way to provide this for her. I knew I couldn’t do it on my own and I told Him that I wouldn’t mention it to anyone {and I wouldn’t pester Dave about it again :)}. Knowing that if this was something that He wanted for her, He would provide.

And, He did.

An unexpected visitor arrived at our door just two days after I prayed that prayer. With a check to be used as we see fit during our trip that would cover most of the cost of this vehicle. I cried and explained what we wanted to do {this happened right as our fundraiser was fully funded}. Dave and I called Dr. L and told her the news. She cried. We cried. It was incredible. To be a small part of the story God is writing for His children on the other side of this earth is a beautiful, awe-inspiring privilege that I am, often times, unable to grasp.

Sing to God; sing praises to his name. Prepare the way for him who rides through the desert, whose name is the Lord. Rejoice before him. God is in his holy Temple. He is a father to orphans and he defends widows. {Psalm 68: 4-5}

let's do this.

i had a conversation with a good friend about THIS post. she asked if there was a way to make a tax deductible donation to help with resources for the orphanages while we are in the DRC next month. i didn’t have a way without partnering with a non-profit organization.

after all, we’re just a group of mommas wanting to go and love on these precious orphaned little ones and fill their bellies and show them that they are treasured daughters and sons of the King of Kings. that they are not forsaken.

that was yesterday.

this morning, i received an email from my amazing friend, mike rusch asking if i would be interested in working through Pure Charity to fundraise for the needed resources. this would provide a tax deductible way for folks to give.

yes. yes! yes!!

this is SUCH an incredible answer to prayer. validating, once again, that God is in control and paving the way for this trip. He has big things planned for our time there.

so, here i am. once again asking you to forfeit your morning latte and donate the $5 instead to saving the lives of little ones halfway around the world.

this isn’t glamorous. you won’t receive anything fancy in return {except a super cute bracelet handmade by my nephew} but you will know that your $5 {or however much you feel led to give} went to something incredibly precious – loving, surrendering, laying down our needs for theirs, Kingdom-building work.

as my friend, lindsy, stated today on her powerful post: caring for orphans as a church:


“God has called us to be a defender of the defenseless because that is who He is. We are returning worship to God when we show His character to the world by championing the cause of the least of these.”
– Orphanology

i cannot wait to share photos and stories from our trip. i know that the Holy Spirit is going to be in our midst. we will be walking on Holy ground. it will be an honor to serve these children in love. i will document exactly where each and every dollar is going. and, you can rest assured that every donation, no matter how big or small, will be used for His glory!

join us HERE to be a part of what God is doing in the lives of some very special people in the DRC.