Blessings and Raindrops

seeking joy in the midst of the ordinary

our first harvest.

I’m typing this post on the sticky-surfaced back patio table. The honey remnants from last night’s dinner have yet to be scrubbed off. I kind of like the way it still holds the tangible remains of an evening gathered around the table with friends and family enjoying the fruits of our labor {well, to be fair, I didn’t actually labor… but I did enjoy the fruits…}. 
We celebrated our first ever honey harvest. There is just something about a harvest that makes you feel a new connection to this earth and the way God created every little thing to work together so beautifully. 

Our friend, Mark, led Dave through the art of bee keeping this year and he was here to initiate the harvest. Thank goodness for Mark. For two specific reasons: 1) we have no idea what we’re doing and 2) Dave had an “incident” with the bees while mowing earlier this year that caused him to want to keep his distance during the actual retrieval from the hive.

We watched how he smoked the hive to calm the bees from a safe distance. See Mark and his son at work waaaaaayyyyyy over there??? 🙂

After the honey was loaded up into the cooler, we all moved into the barn to extract the honey from the frames. This was SO. COOL. Really. Bees are pretty awesome.

After the top of the wax {I think it is wax? I didn’t ask Mark what it was exactly…}, the frames went into this spinning contraption to extract the rest of the honey so that we could pour the sweet nectar into our jars. 

Mark had quite the audience.

I don’t know how else to describe the smell and the taste of freshly harvested honey other than heavenly.

Our bounty. This was all from one hive. Next time, we’ll have five. And that makes me giddy.

This is the face of a baby who was just told she needs to wait seven more months before she can taste this stuff.  I imagine her saying, “WHAT?!?! NOOOOOOO!!!!”

Warm yeast rolls dipped in the fresh, sweet honey drippings = divine.

Clearly, I’m not an expert on bee-keeping. {I am, however, an expert on honey eating}. Which means, if you’re interested in keeping bees, unfortunately, I’m no help to you seeing as I just swept in at the tail end to reap the rewards of Dave and Mark’s hard work.

The Prairie Homesteader, however, can help. She published a great post on how to get started with Honeybees.

Have a happy Saturday friends! I’m enjoying this perfect fall day by sipping hot tea {with fresh honey, of course} outside while watching my boys split logs and chop firewood in preparation for winter. Also, reflecting on the fact that this is my life. It’s all so unexpected that I sometimes have to stop to catch my breath and soak it in. Full of gratitude today…

never once.

As I stood in church on Sunday, singing the words to Matt Redman’s Never Once, reminders of the pain and the heartache that we experienced over the past two years flashed in my mind. Memories I had partially forgotten in these three months of struggling to find our footing in this new normal of hectic schedules, doctor’s appointments, healing hearts, jealous siblings, boundary setting, bedtime chaos, and pure exhaustion.

The tears began to fall as I recounted the ways God was there every single step of the way. How HE was faithful in the battle.

Now that we stand on the mountaintop, we can clearly see just how far we have come. We can see how His hand was on our family even when we didn’t understand what was happening. We can see how He worked all of the pain, all of the tears and all of the uncertainty for good. Even though there were many, many scars and struggles along the way, our hearts can joyfully say that never once did we ever walk alone.

“Standing on this mountaintop
Looking just how far we’ve come
Knowing that for every step
You were with us
Kneeling on this battle ground
Seeing just how much You’ve done
Knowing every victory
Was Your power in us
Scars and struggles on the way
But with joy our hearts can say
Yes, our hearts can say
Never once did we ever walk alone
Never once did You leave us on our own
You are faithful, God, You are faithful
Kneeling on this battle ground
Seeing just how much You’ve done
Knowing every victory

Was Your power in us”

Tomorrow is the three month mark of Sylvie joining our family here at home and I can still hardly believe that we are all here together. As I watch her become more and more comfortable in this new place, as her vocabulary continues to expand {she is talking non-stop!}, as I watch sibling bonds grow deep and as laughter continues to replace tears, I am grateful.

The fact that we went to the pumpkin patch as a family this weekend as if it were the most ordinary thing in the world is beyond me. Every “normal” thing that we do is extraordinary these days. These four little people being here together makes it seemingly impossible to take moments like this for granted.

Just a glimpse of her sass…the hand on the hip. It’s just too much.

He picked this one himself and was very proud, rightfully so. 

A family photo with all of us smiling is impossible. 

This morning, I was reading through my journal and these verses caught my eye. They were the ones that spoke to my aching heart as we waited in those final weeks for word on if Sylvie would be issued her exit permit. We knew God was moving. We knew He was in control. Yet, anxiety and fear were high. These verses were my lifeline in those weeks.

“…for I will fight those who fight you, and I will save your children. … All the world will know that I, the Lord, am your Savior and Redeemer, the Mighty One of Israel.” {Isaiah 49: 25-26}

Long ago the Lord said to Israel: “I have loved you my people, with an everlasting love. With unfailing love, I have drawn you to myself. I will rebuild you, my virgin Israel. You will again be happy and dance with tambourines.” {Jeremiah 31:34}

I will turn their mourning into joy. I will comfort them and exchange their sorrow for rejoicing. {Jeremiah 31:13}

I am counting on the Lord;
Yes, I am counting on him
I have put my hope in His word. {Psalm 130:5}

Everyone will see this miracle and understand that it is the LORD, the Holy One of Israel, who did it. {Isaiah 41:20}

Be silent before the Lord, all humanity, for he is springing into action from his holy dwelling. {Zechariah 2:13}

Can a mother forget her nursing child? Can she feel no love for a child she has borne? But even if that were possible, I would not forget you! See, I have written your name on my hand. {Isaiah 49: 15-16}

I continue to pray these verses for all of my dear momma friends that are waiting for their babies to be under their roof. I’m praying as their arms ache to hold their little loves who wait half a world away. The battle is not over yet. It is unseen but it is very much real. Please continue to pray for justice for the precious children who wait for their families. Thank you, sweet friends.

being intentional.

When we first moved to this old farmhouse in the middle of a bunch of trees {and not much else}, I felt pulled toward a more simplistic way of life. I clearly wasn’t going to turn into Laura Ingalls, but I did want to slow down and be more intentional with my time, my resources and my energy.

The natural tendency for my personality is to over-commit, over-schedule and over-exert. I have a hard time saying no. Yet, all of the striving and running left me feeling burnt out.

This move gave us a chance to step away and re-evaluate our priorities.

Even the fact that we were reducing our square footage energized me. I knew this meant a clean sweep of stuff. Because, we have way too much. In my pregnancy-nesting-get-rid-of-everything mode, I was able to donate, give away and sell a vast majority of unused items. Everything else ended up in the barn to be stored for months until this weekend when we cleared a ton of it out also. {A friend will be hosting a Garage Sale for Orphans and we couldn’t think of a better place to donate our things}.

We looked like the Clampett’s driving down the road… 

With all that said, lately, we have stopped being intentional. We have gotten caught up in schedules and commitments and just the busyness of life. The past couple of nights have been all-night-all-you-can-eat-buffets for Charlotte so I have felt drained during the day and unable to be “productive.” The guilt associated with a lack of productivity has caused me to step back and stop to think about what is most important.

I’ve been reading Tsh Oxenreider’s “Notes from a Blue Bike” and have been convicted to slow down. To be intentional. To love well. 


Because I want to hold myself accountable, I thought I’d write out a few ways to live and love intentionally {particularly in this season with littles and a newborn}…

1. Prioritize my to-do list and select the one most important thing to be done today. Allow myself the freedom and grace to not choose anything from the list some days. Instead, use that time to sit on the floor with my little loves to build puzzles, read books or build spaceships with legos.

2. Date nights: make them happen. Even if they consist of a bottle of wine and conversations on our front porch swing after the littles have gone to bed.

3. Call friends to come hang out for the afternoon. Even if the house is messy or the construction projects are never-ending and they need to step over a few boards and a pile of bricks to enter.




4. Travel. When Dave and I first moved to Arkansas, long before kiddos, we used to take turns planning little weekend’s away to explore our new state. Even if it just meant a long drive and a hike and picnic in the afternoon. We’d also regularly travel the country and the globe to explore new places together. I miss those adventures and I want to cultivate a love for travel in my children. Travel is in my DNA and Dave and I dream of the days when we will all hop on a plane together to explore a new city or a new country {that may have to wait a few years with this crew} but, for now, we can plan little outings for our Saturdays. We can explore new places by hopping in the car and going for a drive. There are so many cute little towns or awesome hiking trails within a short drive from our home. 

5. Say no {when it’s appropriate}. Be protective of our time together as a family. This time is not only rare, it is precious and deserves to be fought for. Even if this leaves me feeling guilty for not being able to commit to as many things as I would like to in this particular season.

6. Turn off the TV. Cartoons can quickly become a babysitter when I’m nursing or trying to get something accomplished {like this post or the dishes in the sink or dinner…}. A little TV watching is fine in our house and movie nights with freshly popped popcorn are one of our favorite traditions but I need to be better about helping the kids foster creativity instead of sitting in front of a TV screen.

This is happening while I type. Creativity in action. 

{I stole this next one from Tsh because this weather is perfect for being outside and we have the perfect little spot for a blanket overlooking the pond:}


6. “Do what you’d normally do with your kids—read books, sculpt play-doh, help with homework—but do it outside on a blanket.”

For more awesome ideas on how to live and love slowly and with intention, check out Tsh’s post, The beauty of living…slowly.

two months.

For two full months, all of my children have been under the same roof. The miracles that unfolded to make this possible are not lost on me for one second.
Getting a photo of all four together? Well, we may need another miracle to make that happen. 
{This is the kind of stuff we’re working with here, folks…}

Bahahahahahahahaha!!! I may frame these. They make me smile.

This girl:

These past two months have been so very full. You guys, she is so, so smart. I love watching her little mind work as she figures out a new toy or “reads” a book or plays on my phone {seriously – she is a tech whiz. I have to hide my phone during the day because she will snag it and send emails and take photos}.

Her language is expanding daily. She understands us perfectly and has started not only repeating words, but using them in the correct context. I am in awe at how quickly she is picking up english. We have really not had any issues communicating since she has been home. I can understand her french-lingala-english-toddler speak perfectly. 🙂

She has made so much progress…

She is no longer afraid of grass or trees or our dog. She now gets excited when she sees daddy and wants to be near him. She no longer needs me to be in her line of sight at all times. She no longer needs me to carry her whenever we are outside of our home, she happily walks along with her brothers or is content to hold my hand. She no longer shuts down when someone new comes into our home or talks to her when we are out and about.

It’s been amazing watching her full personality come out. She is hilarious and fun-loving and so very sweet.

These two:

They are adorable together. Sylvie is such a great helper with Charlotte. She loves to help care for her and is always is the first one to jump up if Charlotte starts to cry. She has several baby dolls that she will feed, burp, rock and sing to while I’m feeding Charlotte. There is typically a “baby” in the swing or rock-n-play whenever I go to lay Charlotte down. This sister-love isn’t one-sided either, Charlotte loves to watch Sylvie and she giggles at her sister all day long. Sylvie lights up when she makes Charlotte laugh. I love when she yells, “mommy! baby!” to get my attention in her french accent. It’s ridiculously cute.

Now, I know I haven’t posted much on this blog about what our transition has looked like. I realize that if you read this blog or follow my Instagram posts, you will get the impression that life is peachy and everyone is happy-go-lucky around here.

Here’s the thing: I am all about transparency. I would never, ever want anyone to jump into adoption expecting ONLY sweet airport homecoming photos and silly videos and lots of snuggles and laughter. Those things are wonderful — incredible, actually – but they aren’t the full picture.

The full picture is hard. Adoption, at it’s core, is about loss. Our girl has lost everything and everyone she has ever known and loved. She has never had a chance to trust. She has learned that everyone leaves. We are working hard to build a foundation of trust and love and safety. We want her to know that we are not going anywhere. We want her to know that she will have food and water and she doesn’t have to be scared that it will run out. We want her to know that she is loved.

Yet, I don’t want to share all of the details here because I want to protect my girl. She is dealing with a lot of hard, hard stuff and not everyone {well anyone, really} needs to know all of the nitty gritty details.

Still, I struggle because I absolutely do not want to paint a false picture. I want y’all to know that we are seeking God’s grace and wisdom each day. We are learning more in this season about His redemptive love than ever before.

We have had an incredibly intimate glimpse into God’s deep love and abundant grace for us. I’ve been gently reminded that I too have run from His love. I too have tried to control my own life and resisted His leading {even when I know that His plans are for my good}. Yet, He has been there. Steadfast. Even when I turn away.

Undeserving, magnificent Grace.

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Now, just in case you would like a little peek into our crazy, here is a photographic proof of the ridiculousness that occurred last week when I just wanted my one family photo at the beach. Is that too much to ask? Why can’t everyone just get together and smile for Pete’s sake?!!? 
So, I gave up on photos actually on the beach. The sunsets brought out the tears from exhausted, water-logged kiddos. We gave it one last valiant effort on the patio of the condo. It was an epic failure. 
{I stand in awe of families that are able to manage beautifully poised, smiling family photos on the sand. Complete with matching outfits and mommas with hair brushed and make-up on. Amazing. I can’t even. We will clearly never be that family}.
This is classic – Nathan is throwing a liiittttlllleee fit {and, clearly, my mom doesn’t realize she is in the shot and we didn’t take the time to clean up the chairs behind us… details…details…}:

I’m giving him the “you better stand up and smile right now” face. Meanwhile, my nephew is trying to sneak out {nana trying to restrain him}:

I give up.

Yep. This is my life. I think I will frame this one:

Nathan’s face is classic. Bottom-lip pout:

Zephaniah 3:17
“The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” (NIV)
I hope y’all have an awesome week! We are slowly getting caught up on laundry and mail and bills and emails. It’s so great to be home and I’m REALLY looking forward to fall… I’m ready! This summer was an amazing whirlwind but I am craving chilly mornings, beautiful fall colors and pumpkin spiced lattes. 😉